The Richard Spooner Column: Don 't forget real, live shoppers�

Profound apologies to my reader for my absence over the past few weeks. There were a number of reasons but I 'll share only one with you.

I was engaged with my colleagues in a work week from hell recently, with publishing demands forcing us to start work at silly o 'clock. Anyway, that 's all part of the game.

The upshot was that I had a few personal chores to undertake and had to wait for a slot of time. I gave myself half-an-hour to pop to the high-street to complete a few quick tasks.

But in the process the Spooner deadline passed - no great deal but fingers rapped by editor.

I write this with a heavy heart, because I 'm one of those rare males who prefers to browse shops rather than a computer screen, especially for interesting things like food, wine, clothing and books. And I want to preserve all real live retail outlets.

One task on this day was to change 520 euros into sterling and deposit them into my current account. I had already tried the previous week to carry out this small task but on the first attempt the branch I went to was closed all day on Thursdays. This was a Thursday.

The second branch was open but could not deal with foreign currency on Saturdays. This was a Saturday.

So, having abandoned my desk, I approached the right branch on the right day. After waiting for 15 minutes at a reception desk, I was told there was a counter for such transactions at the far end of the office. I didn 't know this because the counter could not be seen from the reception area.

However, I marched through the office, turned left - to be confronted with a queue of three people, the first of whom took another ten minutes to conclude their business with the one assistant present.

When I eventually reached the counter, the clerk (are they still called that?) told me to log on to on-line banking with my mobile. Annoyingly, there was no internet connection in this denizen buried deeply off the high-street. Total time taken: 25 minutes.

Having safely converted my euros and deposited the sterling equivalent into my account, a turned to leave the bank, cross the road and attempt to spend some of that money on my second assignment. I needed to replace an electric razor that had burned out when I was re-charging it.

I found what I was looking for fairly quickly in the major high-street store but as I walked to the counter to pay it became apparent I was carrying an empty box.

After another five-minute wait in a queue at the check-out, I was able eventually to talk to the cashier (is that what they are called these days?). With a sigh, she informed me that in order to get the razor that belonged in the box she would have to go to the top-floor storeroom.

But I would have to wait until she cleared the queue behind me. I volunteered to go myself but that was not allowed and eventually one of her colleagues volunteered to climb to the top floor. Fifteen minutes later she emerged with my razor. Total time taken: 20 minutes.

I did then manage to quickly buy some items of food for the week. But this whetted my appetite and I decided to visit a well-know high-street bakers to grab one of their best-selling items. Despite the light being on and staff busying themselves, the doors were firmly shut. I managed to attract their attention but they shook their heads dismissively.

I knew there was another branch on my route home and, joy upon joy, it was open and I joined a small queue in great anticipation. The strapping guy in front of me, who looked like a dedicated steak and chips man, turned out to be a vegan.

While I waited outside, as instructed by a notice on the door, it became apparent that all vegan products had been sold, save for a donut with pink icing. He was there so long I thought the staff were attempting to convert him to carnivorism. Not so, he insisted on arguing the toss about the paucity of stock for vegan aficionados and continued to delay everyone else.

However, I was grateful to the vegan because had he been a steak man he would probably have purchased the item I wanted - and there was only one left. Total waiting time: 10 minutes.

With total travelling time of about 15 minutes, my excursion took one hour ten minutes. I had calculated it would take me a half-hour tops. But the delays meant I had missed the deadline to file a Spooner column. Sorry.

Now this is not meant to be critical of the high-street but more of a plea. If the real live shops want to compete with on-line purchases, please get your act together for those of us who prefer to shop in person�

JL