The Richard Spooner Column: Food warning - Sextons for lunch�
Regional British accents have always fascinated me since I stood in the canteen queue of a national newspaper in Fleet Street.
People came from all over the world to work in what was then the capital of the newspaper industry, so the offices, pubs and restaurants were thick with a myriad of accents and dialects.
And this was no more so than in the feeding stations of national newspapers. The quality varied enormously and I won 't embarrass this particular one because I know its cuisine has improved beyond recognition since it moved out of a decrepit building just off Fleet Street.
In fact the food was so bad that it became the subject of ribaldry throughout the office. At the time the Thames barrier had not been built and nearly every office near the river had notices posted with the heading FLOOD WARNING! The L had been scrubbed out on most of the notices in these particular offices.
Nevertheless, the canteen (I hesitate to call it a restaurant) did have its high spots like decent steaks and, for breakfast, kippers. The same eating facilities, ignoring their paucity, were used by everyone from managing director and editor to office boy and machine operator.
So one lunchtime, I was standing in a long queue when a Cockney voice behind me shouted: 'ere chef. Do me a burnt Sexton on the grill and I 'll have a rake of jockeys with it. ”
Like the chef, who shouted “ok John ”, no-one batted an eyelid and we all knew what the diner wanted for lunch - a well done sirloin with chips.
Now for the translation: Sexton Blake, a fictional detective on radio, which was Cockney rhyming slang for steak. Rake? = lots. Jockeys? = jockeys ' whips = chips. Geddit?
I was reminded of these happy days when I received a missive from a company called Babble, who are language experts.
They carried out a survey which concluded that the UK 's favourite accent was Cockney but, surprise, surprise, Brummie, as they described it, featured in fourth place when people asked which accent they enjoyed listening to most. It came behind Cockney, Geordie and Scots but ahead of Welsh.
When it came to accents regarded as the most fun, Northern Irish and Geordie were in joint first place followed by Scots, Cockney, Brummie and then Scouse and Welsh.
But Brummie slumped to the bottom place in the top five when people were asked which dialect they wanted a spouse or future spouse to have. The order came out: Northern Irish or Scots, Welsh or Cockney, Yorkshire, Southeast with the West Country and Brummie languishing at the bottom.
When asked which regional accent they wished they had and which sounded the kindest, Brummie did not feature in either of the top fives.
The survey was carried out last month across UK regions of 100 people over 18. A pretty small sample, so perhaps there 's hope for Brummie yet.
And if Jack Grealish scores the winning goal on Sunday, we 'll insist it becomes the national dialect�
JL